The Process
The Collaborative process follows these basic steps:
1. Build and meet with your team of Collaborative professionals.
In this step, you and your former partner will each reach out to a Collaborative family professional, such as a lawyer, financial professional, child specialist, or parenting or divorce coach.
If the Collaborative process is right for you and your former partner, you will receive a Collaborative Participation Agreement from one of the professionals to sign. Once signed, court will no longer be an option, so long as you want to keep working in the Collaborative process. The Agreement also provides that former spouses will be open and forthcoming with financial information and will communicate respectfully with one another.
2. Set intentions, values and goals.
Your Collaborative team will assist you and your former partner in determining your interests and goals, and the underlying values you each bring to the discussion. This helps you both figure out what really matters to you, which is instrumental in reaching agreements about children, finances, and next steps.
In this process, you and your former partner will then share your primary goals. Your team assists you in identifying and then resolving issues once all the necessary information has been shared – this is where it’s great to have a financial or parenting specialist on board to help clarify what information is needed and what it means.
3. Gather information about you, your former spouse, your children and finances.
You and your former partner need to both understand the family’s financial reality and get legal and/or financial advice prior to making any decisions. Your team will help you share all relevant information and work with you to problem-solve in a fair and creative way. You may look at budgets and review other financial issues such as qualifying for a new mortgage, valuing family assets, or dividing pensions.
4. Generate ideas, possibilities and options.
This is the stage where you both have all of the information you need and the team works to come up with solutions. If the legal framework doesn’t work best for your family, your team will help you come up with different, creative solutions. By using this process, you and your former partner can come up with an agreement that actually works for you and will continue to work long into the future.
5. Evaluate and select the best steps forward for your family.
Among the options generated by your team, there may be a few that seem to best address all issues and set up both you and your former partner for success in your new lives. With your team, you discuss, analyze, and ultimately agree on the terms of the agreement and next steps. Your lawyer will work with you to consider all legal, financial, and interpersonal implications to make sure the options chosen are workable and long-lasting.
6. Finalize your separation agreement.
Once all issues have been resolved, your lawyers will prepare a separation agreement reflecting all the decisions you and your former partner agreed on. Before you sign, you can make sure all your questions are answered by the professionals.
Once everything is finalized, you’ll both sign and then execute any other necessary paperwork (such as a property transfer, a pension division, or a divorce). Then, that’s it! You’re done and you can both move forward in a good way.
What if a settlement cannot be reached?
If you and your former partner cannot reach agreement on one or more issues, your lawyers may suggest a second opinion, using a mediator within the Collaborative process, or going to court or arbitration. If you do need to go to arbitration or court, your lawyer can no longer represent you, but your lawyer can continue to advise you during a mediation.
